Train of Thought: 4/20/12

The amount of technology around us is astounding. Sooner or later, we all get sucked into using it. Sure, there are the token hipsters who get by with their landline and letters written in blackberry juice, but let’s be real, almost everyone has a cell phone and a Facebook. You can’t expect to function in this modern world without a way to organize your time and get in touch with people 24/7.

Apparently, you also can’t get by without virtually sling–shooting birds at pigs, taking perfectly tinted “selfies” to share with the Instagram community, and playing word games with people who are definitely looking at a dictionary or spelling in Klingon. Now, maybe I’m just a little jaded because nobody told me that the birds in Angry Birds had special powers for the first two months that I played the game, or maybe I’m so non–photogenic that not even the “Brannan” effect can save me, and maybe I had a traumatic childhood Scrabble experience, but it seems to me that if we put some of these hours we usually spend social networking and playing games toward creativity we could already have thought up a way to build an ice skating rink on the sun or something.

Don’t get me wrong, technology is definitely helpful. I love Skyping with friends and relatives who live far away, and yes, I’ve been known to indulge in some Temple Run every so often. But sometimes it seems like things would be a whole lot simpler and slightly less awkward if everyone wasn’t constantly plugged in.

For example, why is it now socially acceptable for people to have their earbuds in while they’re having a conversation with someone? Maybe it doesn’t matter if only a few words are exchanged, but if an hour or two passes that’s just rude. I don’t care how much your ears can multitask. If I’m really so boring that you need a sweet serenade to stay interested, why are we interacting?

And don’t even get me started on YouTube. Sometimes I make the mistake of scrolling down to look at the comments on a video I’m watching. It’ll be a video of a chinchilla taking a dust bath or something (don’t judge me) and the first comment I see is Forqet the h8ers! Justin is hecka cute! Wait, what? In about five seconds there are like fifty posts either agreeing with the girl or “being a hater.” Look, crazed Bieber fans, get away from my chinchilla video. Your input is not relevant. Do you really have nothing more important going on in your lives? I’m trying to watch chinchillas here.

Technology is innovative, convenient, and super entertaining. But let’s be reasonable! Just because you have the opportunity to text a million other people doesn’t mean you should overlook the friend standing right next to you. If we decide to let technology completely rule our lives, don’t come crying to me when the robot apocalypse comes.